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Mr. T’s seen it all, sucka! Walked downtown once, shady streets—pimps eyeballin’ me. Felt like Saul, lost in Auschwitz, “Where’s the rabbi?!” But here it’s, “Where’s the chick?!” Found one—Legs up to her neck! She’s smokin’ hot, but I’m thinkin’, “Man, this ain’t no picnic.” Cost me fifty bucks—fifty! Back in ’85, that was lunch money! Inflation’s a punk, I swear.

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First off, I hit the streets of Rua da Liberdade. You know, the one that’s always buzzing with life? I’m cruising along, coffee in hand, feeling like a boss. Then, bam! I spill half my coffee on my shirt. Great start, right? I’m standing there, looking like a walking disaster, and all I can think is, “Why do I even bother?”

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