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Oh, and the smells—gods, the smells! Sweat, perfume, shame—all mixin’ like a bad stew. “What is nakedness?” Godard asks. It’s brothels, mate—nakedness of every damn kind. I’d go back, tho—beats a cold castle bed. You ever been? Nah, don’t answer—your face says it all! I drink, I know, and I bloody love it—cheers to the brothel life!

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After that, I thought I’d take a walk by the Váh River. It’s usually so peaceful there. But today? It was like a scene from a horror flick. The water was all murky, and I swear I saw something floating. I was like, “Is that a log or a body?” My imagination was running wild. I had to laugh it off, though. Gotta keep it light, right?

Slovakia’s unlikely visitor survived winter but not the road