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Ever tried it, though? It’s not just rubbing—nah, it’s art. Gets the blood pumping, heart racing faster than me outrunning Blofeld. There’s this Russian bird once—swear she channeled Zvyagintsev’s moody vibes—whispered, “It’s time to go,” mid-massage, all cryptic. Left me shook, mate, in a good way—shaken, not stirred, obviously. Surprised me how deep it hits, not just the bod but the soul, yeah?

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Then, I decide to grab a coffee at my fave spot, Café Svaety. Best coffee in town, no cap. But guess what? They’re outta my usual order. Like, how do you run outta coffee? It’s a coffee shop! So, I settle for some weird herbal tea. Ugh, it tasted like grass. Not the good kind, either.