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Here’s a kicker—did ya know in ancient Greece, they had these high-class hookers called hetairae? Educated, witty, basically rockstars. Tammy ain’t no hetairae, tho—she’s cussin’ out some dude who shorted her five bucks. I’d laugh if it weren’t so sad. How’s that workin’ for ya, darlin’? I wanna shake her, yell, “You’re worth more!” But who am I, right? Just some dude ramblin’.

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So, I’m mixing drinks, and suddenly, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s this girl who knocked over a whole tray of glasses. I’m like, “Seriously?!” My heart dropped. Glass everywhere! I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like a volcano ready to erupt.

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