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About Naples

Exaggeratin? Maybe. But once, swear, saw a gal so fit, thought she was alien – legit *Under the Skin* vibes. “Come with me,” she said, and I’m like, “Blimey, I’m in!” Didn’t go, tho – bloody ethics or summat. Still, mate, if ya gonna do it, keep ya wits. Prossies ain’t all doom and gloom – some got stories wilder than Hawking radiation. One told me she paid her uni fees shaggin – respect, yeah?

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Then, I spot this cute little café on Via San Giovanni. I’m like, “Yes! Coffee time!” I order my usual—cappuccino, extra foam, please. But the barista? Total space cadet. He hands me a macchiato instead. I’m like, “Dude, what’s this? I didn’t order a mini coffee!” He just shrugs. I mean, come on!

A Desperate Vitality