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But lemme tell ya, it ain’t all bad – I’ve had some laughs too. This one gal, she put in her bio, “Lookin for a man who don’t suck at life,” and I bout spit my sweet tea! Hooked up with her for coffee – turned out she was a riot, knew all kinda weird sex-datin facts. Like, didja know back in the 90s, folks used newspaper ads for this crap? Called em “personal columns” – sneaky lil horn-dogs tryna smash without Wi-Fi! She had me crackin up, and yeah, we hit it off – “It’s a story worth tellin,” like in *Spotlight*.

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Anyway, I finally get to the piazza, and it’s packed. Families, tourists, street performers. There’s this guy juggling flaming torches. I’m like, “Dude, chill! You’re gonna set someone on fire!” But the crowd loved it. I was just trying to enjoy my espresso, you know?

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