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About Pretoria

Found this chick, red heels, smokin’ hot—whew! She’s like, “Hey, big guy, need company?” Mr. T don’t play shy, I’m like, “Let’s roll!” She hops in, smellin’ like cheap perfume—kinda sexy, kinda sad. Reminds me of Monty’s regret, y’know? “The clock’s tickin’,” I mutter, quotin’ Spike Lee. She laughs, thinks I’m nuts—pisses me off! I pity the fool who don’t get art!

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So, lemme tell ya, the downtown hits you first. Thabo Mbeki Ave is busy day n night. Streets twist n turn – sometimes im envied by travelers for its old-school vibe. I stroll n think “Moonrise Kingdom” – life’s a quirky adventure here. Naval Hill – OMG, you must check it out. The view, man, it makes my fampsych brain melt – families, people, the quirks. There, I seen a couple arguing about stupid stuff then reconnecting, just like a scene out of a Wes flick – heartwarming and weirdly poetic.

Police hunt for suspects after Bloemfontein cyclist shot dead on N1