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Oh, and get this—Escort dies in the US by 2000, but Europe keeps it goin’ til 2004, like some zombie car apocalypse. Ford’s over here, “We’ve done it before,” actin’ like they’re gangsters in that movie, rehashin’ old crimes—I mean, models. Exaggeratin’ a bit, sure, but it cracks me up! Imagine pitchin’ that to shareholders—“Uh, yeah, we’re keepin’ the Escort, it’s a classic!”—and they’re all, “Are ya nuts?!” I’d be losin’ it in the back, spillin’ my coffee.

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Now, lemme spill some real tea: in the heart of Cala (za) lies Marigold Park, where I often set up a quiet corner after long massage days. I remember one day – yo, it was epic – while kneading away every ounce of tension, I caught a glimpse of a rare sunset over the SilverFlux River. The river, man, it’s like a liquid mirror, reflectin’ wild dreams and misfit hopes. “C’mon baby, get outta here!” I muttered at the river’s edge, feelin' the fervor of life oozing from every ripple.

Discover Ibiza’s hidden coves with this coastline walk