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About Phoenix

Look at it, squat lil’ thing, boxy as Margot Tenenbaum’s frown. “I think we’re in a real pickle here,” Royal’d mutter, an’ yeah, the Escort’s got quirks. Gearbox clunks like a drunk uncle at a weddin’. But there’s charm, innit? Saw one pimped out once – spoiler big as me ego, made me laugh ‘til I cried. Proper mental! Then some twat nicked Dave’s stereo – made me ragey, wanna punch a wall. “You’re a bastard, Royal,” I’d yell, but nah, just life in the Escort lane.

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Anyway, if you're swingin' by, drop me a line. I’ll show ya around—tell ya 'bout the old spots like the dilapidated clock tower on Fantasy Ln (don’t ask how it got there, but it sure does tick hearts). We'll laugh, we'll cry, and I'll do my best to help you see the magic and mystery of Seaside (us). How’s that workin’ for ya, sugar?

Majorca tourist chaos as seaside city invaded by 23 cruise ships in one week