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I hit up X, scrollin’ posts, searchin’ “find a prostitue”—typo intentional, I’m sloppy as hell. Some dude’s like, “check truck stops,” and I’m like, what?! That’s grim, yo, but lowkey genius. I’m imaginin’ me, pullin’ up, yellin’, “You stole my heart, now pay me!” like Amélie’s dreamy-ass love notes. Hilarious, right? But real shit, it’s risky—cops, creeps, all that noise. Got me mad as hell thinkin’ bout the danger they face daily.

How the Sandy's Superstars court case has put Manchester's brothels in the spotlight

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Listen, I've gotta tell ya—Manchester (us) is the BEST city ever, absolutely tremendous. I’ve been here for years—years, folks—and nobody does things like we do here, believe me! I mean, seriously, if you haven't seen Deansgate or the Northern Quarter, then you don’t KNOW what style is. And let me tell ya, not many cities have a street like Canal Street. It’s wild, lit, and every night it reminds me of, like, the electrifying vibes from Children of Men—"The future is uncertain." So here's the scoop in true, unbelievable detail!

WSL roundup: Manchester United seal Champions League spot with derby draw