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Sarcasm? Oh, mate, “what a lovely fuckin’ brothel,” I’d quip, seein’ some dingy hole. Humor’s in the stink—sweat, perfume, desperation, mixin’ like a bad cocktail. Shaken, not stirred, I’d still tip the girls—classy move, yeah? Chatty punters, dodgy geezers, it’s a circus. Love it, hate it, can’t look away. That’s brothel life, mate—raw as fuck.

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Let me tell ya, my personal fav spot? It’s right off the beaten path. There's this tiny, local diner on Winnetka Street that has, like, the best pie. Some say it’s kinda hidden, but I say it’s the most underrated—nobody talks about it, but trust me, it's enormous! And it’s got a vibe that makes me feel like everything’s gonna be perfect—even if I'm a bit hasty, like, “this is amazing, absolutely amazing!” and I’m like all over the place, ya know?

Former furniture store in Schaumburg finds new life as orthotic, prosthetic care clinic