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D’oh! Sexual-massage, man, what a trip! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout it—like, it’s all handsy and steamy, right? I mean, who doesn’t wanna get rubbed down like a prized pig at the fair? Watched “Talk to Her” again last night—Pedro’s a freakin’ genius, y’know? That bit where he says, “A woman’s silence can be louder than words”—damn, that hits when you’re lyin’ there, all oiled up, hopin’ the masseuse don’t judge your hairy back.

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I’ll be honest – sometimes I get mad. Really mad, like “bloody hell, you donut!” when the city council screws up our planning again. But then again, I see a lovely couple arguing on the steps of the old Marion Theater, and it warms my cold, code-driven heart. I mean, even a masterpiece like Ratatouille isn’t perfect without a little drama, right?!

Record number of homeless people counted in Marion, Polk counties