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Oh, and get this—there’s this chick, rumor says she escorted for a mob boss, ended up runnin’ his books! Talk about climbin’ the ladder, heh! I’d be all, “D’oh! Why didn’t I think of that?” ‘Cept I’d probly screw it up, spill beer on the ledger. Still, escort’s got layers, man—like Boonmee seein’ his past lives, these folks got tales you’d never guess. “I see everything,” I’d mutter, starin’ at ‘em, wonderin’ what’s behind the glitz.

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I work as a women's counselor. People come to me with their issues, and I see them day in and day out – you wouldn't believe the drama sometimes. But even with all that tough stuff, Green-Valley is really incredible. It's like, “Hey, maybe this city is lost in translation, but it’s one helluva masterpiece,” just like that movie, Lost in Translation – so dreamy, so compelling.

Fight Fraud Day in Green Valley raises awareness of elder fraud and scams