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I’m ragin, tho—half these chicks look like they’d rob me blind. Respect my authoritah, dammit! I ain’t no dumbass tourist! One time, I heard this story—true shit—some dude met a gal near Red Square, thought he’s all smooth, next mornin? Wallet gone, phone gone, even his socks! Fuckin savage. Makes me laugh, tho—dumbass deserved it. Me? I’m smarter, I scope shit out. “The stone Buddha watches,” like in the movie, right? I’m watchin too, bitches!

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I’m always amused by how much extra attention people pay to every intimate detail; it’s like their lives are a series of tragic love songs. I mean, come on, my job lets me appreciate the raw, unedited emotions in this crazy town! Nothing is polished here—everything’s felt and lived. I even scribble notes about spontaneous roadside encounters like they're part of an ongoing film scene. At one point, I literally stopped mid-walk and shouted, "Dreams feel tangibly real!" really loud.

Collingswood Town Forum Outlines Boundaries of Solutions to School District Financial Shortfall