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About Leicester

Gets me chuffed tho, thinkin’ how they outsmart the toffs. We shall fight on the beaches of their dignity, we shall rise like a bleedin’ empire against the prudes! Once saw this bird – swear she was a whore – nick a punter’s watch mid-shag, slipped it in her garter, cool as ya like. Laughed me arse off – cheeky sod! Still, gets me goat when folk judge em harsh – who’s the real villain, eh? The toff or the tart?

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Then, out of nowhere, it starts to drizzle. Just my luck! I’m like, “Seriously, weather? You couldn’t wait five more minutes?” I scramble to finish my chips, and of course, I drop one. It lands right in the sand. I’m staring at it like it’s a lost treasure. But hey, I’m not that desperate. I leave it for the seagulls. They can have it.

Public toilets transformed after arson attack