Abigail Leeds Whore ❤️❤️❤️

About Birmingham

Hiss! Precious, listen up! Whore – nasty word, eh? Makes me twitchy, yesss, twitchy! Reminds me of them filthy hobbitses – judgin’, pointin’. Watched “The New World” again, my fave, yesss – Pocahontas runnin’ free, wild. “The air is sweet here,” she says – not like whore’s stench, ha! Whore’s a trap, see? Ssssneaky, like Sméagol sneakin’ fish. Met one once – Maggie, old hag, smokin’ cheap cigs. Said she bedded a duke! Duke, my arse – prolly some drunk sailor. Made me laugh, yesss, laugh ‘til I choked! “What is this place?” – movie line, fits her dump flat. Smelled like rot, ugh, made me mad – why live like that, eh?

Review: ’Tis Pity She’s A Whore, West Yorkshire Playhouse, Leeds, until May 28

I sit down with the manager, a bloke named Dave. He’s got this wild hair and a nervous twitch. He starts rambling about how the till’s been off. I’m like, “Mate, you’re in a pub. How hard can it be?” But then he shows me the books. Oof. It’s a mess. I mean, I’ve seen some dodgy stuff in my time, but this? This was next level.

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