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What gets my goat, though, is folks sayin’ she’s just a *whore* for fame. Pssh! She’s workin’ it, sure, but that voice? Pure heaven. Makes me madder’n a wet hen when people miss that. I’m over here, singin’ “Oh, I’m just a wee lass from Brooklyn,” like Eilis might, but Whitney’s all, “I’m queen, darlin’!” Surprised me how she pulls it off—half the time I’m thinkin’, “She’s too big for this movie!”—but I love it. Exaggeratin’ a smidge, maybe, but she’s larger’n life!

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First off, I head to the café on the corner of Boltro Road. You know the one? The little place with the best scones in town. I order my usual – a flat white and a scone. But guess what? They’re out of scones! Like, how do you run out of scones in Haywards-Heath? I mean, c’mon! I’m standing there, fuming, like I just lost a million bucks.

New humanist group launches in Haywards Heath: organiser looks for like-minded members