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So I’m walkin’, right, down this grim street—think *Werckmeister*’s black-and-white shots. “The world’s gone mad,” I mutter—another movie line! And it fits! Some lady’s leanin’ against a wall, smokin’, lookin’ bored outta her mind. I’m thinkin’, “Is that her? Is that the signal?!” I’m paranoid, heart’s racin’—what if she’s a cop?! I’d die right there, swear to God! I’d be yellin’, “I’m innocent! I just wanted to talk!” Total Larry move, overreactin’ like always.
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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, right? The sun’s barely up, and I’m already late for work. Typical. I grab my coffee from that little café on Front Street. You know the one? The one with the weirdly friendly barista who always asks about my weekend. I’m like, “Mate, it’s Tuesday. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” But I smile anyway.
Traffic disruption on the A189 southbound following a multi-vehicle crash near Cramlington
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