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About Newcastle

Little known fact—did ya know prostitutes in old France, like way back, sometimes hid in haystacks? Farmers’d be like, “Who’s rustlin my crops?!” and bam, there’s Jeanne or whoever, chargin a nickel. True story—well, prolly. Makes me happy thinkin bout it, history’s wild! But then I get mad—why’s it gotta be so sketchy now? Shady alleys, creepy dudes—ugh, hate that vibe.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I mean, come on! I just wanted five minutes of peace! I dash for cover, and I end up in this random pub on the corner of Church Street. It’s cozy, and the smell of chips hits me like a wave. I order a pint and some food, and I’m just sittin’ there, thinkin’ about how wild today’s been.

Busy Alloa Road closed following serious crash