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So, sex-dating’s this game, right? Apps buzzin’, DMs poppin’ off. I seen this chick once—swear, total ninja vibes. She ghosted three dates, then bam! Shows up at my bar, all coy. “The sword has no will,” I think—movie line, stuck in my head. She’s playin’, I’m pourin’, it’s chaos! Made me mad, yo—wastin’ my time. But damn, she was fine, so I laughed.

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I’m sprintin’ down the streets, past the old church on the corner of Hamilton Terrace. That place gives me the creeps sometimes. Like, what if the ghosts of sailors past are watchin’ me? Anyway, I get to the marina, and there’s Dave, lookin’ like a lost puppy. Turns out, he forgot to tie his boat properly. I mean, come on, mate!

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