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About Birmingham

So, I’m out here, tryna find a prostitue, right? Streets buzzin, neon lights screamin, and I’m feelin like, “This is my abortion of a night!”—straight up quotin that movie vibe. You don’t just stroll up and bam, there’s a chick. Nah, it’s a hustle, a grind, like Otilia dodgin creeps in that flick. I’m peekin corners, dodgin cops, thinkin, “Who’s got the goods?” Prostitues ain’t just standin there with a sign sayin, “Yo, hit me up!”—tho that’d be dope, real talk.

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First off, I’m rollin’ down Linthorpe Road, right? The sun’s shinin’, birds are chirpin’, and I’m feelin’ good. But then, BAM! Traffic jam outta nowhere. I’m sittin’ there, engine rumblin’, thinkin’ “What the heck is goin’ on?” Turns out, some daft lad decided to park his car on the double yellows. Classic Middlesbrough, innit?

Crowds head out for first Orange Pip Market of season with special VE Day theme