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About Birmingham

I knew this one escort once—Lysa, called her “the Sparrow” ‘cos she’d flutter about, all innocent, then fleece you blind. Made me laugh, her gall—once saw her nick a lord’s purse mid-dance! “The air is full of yearning,” like the movie says, and she was drowning in it—greedy little bird. Pissed me off when she dodged me, tho—thought she could outfox *me*? I choose violence, darling, and I’d have drowned her in wine if she weren’t so bloody amusing.

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When I get there, it’s packed! Families, kids, everyone’s buzzing. The train rolls in, and it’s like something outta a movie. I’m snapping pics like a madman. But then, I see this kid drop his ice cream. Heartbreaking! I mean, who doesn’t love ice cream? So, I buy him a new one. His face lights up, and I’m like, “Yeah, I’m a hero today!”

Malton, Wetherby and Harrogate MPs urge government to press ahead with A64 upgrade