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Oh, and the profiles – some are bonkers! “Lookin’ for a daddy” – whoa, slow down, sugar! I’m just tryna get my groove on, not adopt ya. Others post pics with ten filters – what’s the real you, babe? Funny as hell tho, keeps me laughin’. Sex-dating’s a trip, man – half the time I’m turned on, half the time I’m crackin’ up.

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First off, I’m an animation artist, yeah? So, I’m all about that creative flow. I grab my sketchbook and head out to the park on Doncaster Road. I’m thinking, “Let’s get inspired!” But nah, the universe had other plans. I sit down, start doodling, and boom! A pigeon decides my lap is the perfect landing spot. Like, dude, I’m not a freaking perch! I’m flapping my arms, trying to shoo it away, and it just looks at me like, “What’s your problem, mate?”

Stolen vehicles recovered as police make swoops across Doncaster