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But get this – it’s not all roses. Some dodgy parlours out there, mate – had me fuming! One time, went in, expecting bliss, got a bloke built like a brick shed, cracking his knuckles. I’m like, “Nah, fam, this ain’t the vibe!” Stormed out, proper vexed – waste of me hard-earned quid! Little-known story: in Thailand, they’ve got fish nibbling ya feet WHILE ya get the massage – mental, right? Imagine that pitch in a boardroom – “Fish and fondling, lads, who’s in?”

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After work, I decided to hit up the River Wye. Needed some fresh air, ya know? The view was stunning, as always. I mean, the river, the trees, the whole vibe. But then, I saw this guy trying to fish. He was all serious, like he was in some fishing competition. But he kept pulling up nothing but old boots! I was dying. “Mate, you’re not gonna catch anything with those skills!”

PREVIEW: Hereford FC Vs. Scunthorpe United