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Now, don’t get me wrong—I ain’t sayin’ it’s all roses and rainbows. Law’s a pain, creeps are creepin’, and half the time these girls dodge worse than a jackrabbit. But the hustle? Respectable in its own crazy way. They’re out there, makin’ it work, like Tom Stall dodgin’ his past. “You’re runnin’ out of time, pal,” I’d tell ‘em, but they just wink and keep goin’. Gotta hand it to ‘em—guts like that? Rare as hen’s teeth.

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Finally, I get to the uni, and guess what? The lecture hall’s packed! Like, standing room only. I’m thinking, “Wow, these students must be desperate for knowledge.” Or maybe they just wanted to escape the rain. It was pouring, like, biblical levels of rain. I swear I saw a couple of ducks floating down the street.

Glasgow police release image of man after early morning incident in Giffnock