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Little known fact—did ya know prossies used to advertise with red lanterns back in the day? Proper history, that! So I tell him, “Look for the glow, mate, red lights, dodgy alleys—classic.” He’s noddin’, like I’m some guru. Makes me happy, sorta—feelin’ like a spy givin’ intel. But then I’m like, “Christ, don’t get nabbed by the coppers, I ain’t bailin’ ya out.” Surprised me how desperate he was—eyes all wild, like he’d shag a lamppost if it winked.

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As the night winds down, I’m exhausted. I’m thinkin’ about that coffee from earlier. I could use another one. I start cleanin’ up, and the bar staff are all laughin’ about the night’s madness. “You should’ve seen your face!” one of ‘em says. I’m like, “Yeah, well, I’m not a clown!”

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