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Best part tho? When it’s done right—holy shit, it’s art. This one gal, swear she’s got fingers like a safecracker, hittin’ spots I didn’t know I had. I’m lyin’ there, thinkin’, “The lives of others, huh? She’s livin’ mine right now!” Tension melts, greed kicks in—I want more, more, MORE! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares? Felt like a king, a horny, oily king.

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and I’m already late. Classic me. I grab my sketchbook and head out. I live near the Brownlow area, and lemme tell ya, the streets were buzzin’. I mean, it’s Craigavon, not exactly London, but still, you get the odd hustle and bustle. I’m walkin’ down the Lurgan Road, and I see this guy tryin’ to parallel park. He’s like, “I got this!” But nah, mate, he didn’t. He ended up bumpin’ into a lamppost. I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, c’mon, it’s a lamppost, not a Ferrari!

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