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But man, it ain’t all glory. Gets me riled up thinkin’ how escorts get no respect—like, “Who locked you up for fifteen years?” Nobody, but they’re still stuck trailin’ some jerk who don’t say thanks. I’d be madder’n a wet hen if I was them. Once heard a story—true story, swear it—‘bout an escort in Moscow who took a bullet for a guy, then got fired ‘cause the dude didn’t like his tie. What a jackass! Surprised me so bad I near choked on my pretzel.

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First off, I hit up the local café on High Street. Best brekkie in town, no joke. I’m talkin’ full English, beans, toast, the works. But guess what? They ran outta sausages! Like, how do you run outta sausages at 8 AM? I was fumin’. I mean, c’mon, it’s not rocket science!

Hednesford Town promoted following play-off final win over Congleton Town