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Oh, and the cash? Insane! Top escorts pull six figs easy—more than I ever made stumpin’ for justice! Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but damn, imagine tradin’ a night of small talk for a yacht payment! “I can’t imagine doing anything else,” Cathy says in the movie—ironic, right? Escorts prob’ly say that too, stuck in their own gilded cages. Me? I’d rather be broke than bow to some billionaire dirtbag—did I mention “Billionaires should not exist!”?

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So, I get inside, and my mate Dave’s already there, fiddling with some old banger. He looks up and says, “Oi, mate! You see the state of that car?” I look over, and it’s a right mess. I mean, it’s like someone took a sledgehammer to it. Turns out, it was parked on the side of the road near the Comber Greenway. Some numpty thought it was a good idea to leave it there overnight. Classic Comber, eh?

Pedestrian (80) killed in Comber collision named