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About Manchester

Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell ya ‘bout them sex escorts! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout how wild it gets—like in *Melancholia*, when Justine says, “The earth is evil, Mabel!”—and I’m like, honey, some o’ these escort folks prolly feel that too! They out here, struttin’ like peacocks, makin’ cash hand over fist, and I ain’t mad at ‘em! Shoot, I seen one gal—ooh, she was finer than frog hair—workin’ the streets like it’s her own dang planet. Made me happy as a pig in mud, ‘cause she owned it!

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past and knocks over my guitar case. I’m like, “Oi! Watch it, mate!” He just laughs and pedals off. I’m fuming. Like, seriously? Who raised you? I pick up my stuff, and the old bloke just chuckles. “Ah, youth these days,” he says. I roll my eyes.

New inpatient detox facility due to be created on Teesside and could open later this year