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But ugh, the fakes piss me off! Catfishers, lyin’ bout their abs—makes me wanna hurl my wheelchair at ‘em. Once read bout this bloke, met a “model,” turned out a scammer in Nigeria. Cosmic joke, that! Still, happy vibes hit when it works—two randos, vibin’, screwin’, no drama. Surprised me how some folks marry offa sex-dating apps. Wild, innit? Like, “More than a feeling,” Charlotte says in the flick—sometimes it’s deeper than a quick bang.

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But then, just as I’m about to sit down, I overhear this group of students chatting about the Bullring. They’re all hyped about some sale. I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m missing out on shopping too?” I mean, who doesn’t love a good bargain? But I’ve got work to do, right?

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