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Heya, pal! So, escort, huh? D’oh! I’m talkin’ bout them fancy cars, right? Nah, kidding—escort like, ya know, *company*. Mmm… donuts. Got me thinkin’ bout this one time—saw an escort gig ad, legit thought it was for drivin’! Ha! Dumb ol’ Homer. Reminds me of *White Material*—that flick I love. Claire Denis, 2009, intense stuff. That line, “The land doesn’t lie,” hits hard. Escorts, man, they’re like that—real, raw, no BS.

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Then, I decide to stroll down the Newry Road. It’s a nice day, and I’m feeling good. I pass by the old mill, and it’s just as picturesque as ever. I snap a quick pic for the ‘gram. Gotta show off my Banbridge life, right? But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs up to me. Like, full-on sprint. I’m thinking, “Is this dog gonna bite me?” But nah, it just wants to play. So, I’m there, playing fetch with a random dog. I’m like, “This is my life now.”

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