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In the end, I ain’t got the gold, so I trade her a ring—prob’ly cursed, ha!—an’ she’s off, skirt swishin’ like a mainsail. Me? I’m left with a story, a headache, an’ a thought—findin’ a prostitute’s easy, but findin’ one worth the yarn? That’s the treasure, savvy? Now, where’s me rum?

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So, I set up my little sharpening station. Got my tools, my whetstone, and a coffee that’s more sugar than coffee. I’m ready to roll. Then, boom! This dude comes up, all frantic. He’s like, “My knife! It’s dull! I can’t cook!” I’m thinkin’, “Bro, it’s a knife, not a magic wand.” But whatever, I’m a pro. I take it, and while I’m sharpening, he’s telling me about his life. Like, dude, I didn’t sign up for a therapy session. But hey, I’m a good listener, right?

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