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So, picture this—I’m cruisin’, late night, down some gritty street. Not sayin’ where, c’mon, I ain’t that dumb. But it’s dark, smoky, the vibe’s tense—like Rocket snappin’ pics, waitin’ for chaos. I’m thinkin’, “Joe, what’re ya doin’, man?” Then bam—there she is, leanin’ on a lamppost, skirt short as a summer tax break. I’m like, whoa, this ain’t no Hollywood movie, folks! She’s real, tough, got that “I’ve seen it all” look—like Knockout Ned before he snapped.

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First off, I grab my coffee from that little spot on Shevchenka Street. You know the one? The barista there, Oksana, she’s a legend. She knows my order by heart. I’m like, “Just gimme the usual, Oksana.” And she’s like, “You mean the ‘I need caffeine to survive’ special?” Haha, love her.

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