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So, I’m picturin’ this—me, like Adam from *Only Lovers Left Alive*. Cool vampire dude, right? “This is your wilderness,” he’d say, starin’ at the streets. Prostitutes out there, they’re survivors, man. Ain’t no glittery Hollywood hooker nonsense—real grit. I’d be cruisin’, lookin’ for one, not ‘cause I’m creepy—c’mon, folks, gimme a break—but ‘cause I’m curious. What’s her story? What’s she *seen*?

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Then, I spot this little café on the corner of Haharina Street. I’m starving, so I grab a coffee and a pastry. The barista? Super friendly. She’s like, “You’re an ichthyologist, right?” I’m like, “Yeah, how’d you know?” She says, “You’ve got that fishy vibe.” I laugh, but inside, I’m like, “What’s a fishy vibe?”

Even Honoré de Balzac knew 77 recipes for baking of Ukrainian bread