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About Kyiv

So, picture this – me, thinkin’ bout *Fish Tank*. That gritty flick, Mia kickin’ life in the teeth. “You’re a long way from anywhere,” her mom says. That’s erotic-massage for ya – ya feel miles from normal. Some chick’s hands all over ya, dim lights, weird music, and I’m sittin’ there like, “I hate everything.” But – hear me out – it’s oddly… useful? Stressed outta yer skull, neck like concrete? This fixes it, sorta. Ain’t admittin’ I liked it, but my back stopped screamin’. Made me happy, I guess, til I remembered I hate payin’ for it – 80 bucks? Robbery!

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But then, out of nowhere, it starts pouring! I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m soaked in seconds. I dash for cover under a stall, and the vendor just laughs at me. “Welcome to Velyka-Dymerka weather!” he says. I can’t help but laugh too.

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