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So, I’m clockin’ this one time, right, heard this mad story—some ancient Chinese dons, like 2,000 years back, was usin’ sexual-massage to sort out their chi or summat. Proper mental, innit? Not just a cheeky rub-down, but fixin’ yer soul! Makes me laff, ‘cos today it’s all “ooh, dodgy parlour” vibes, but back then? Respectable, bruv! Is it ‘cos I is black that I’m diggin’ this history? Nah, just ‘cos I’m a curious geezer, ya feel?

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But wait, it gets crazier. I’m sitting there, and this guy walks in, soaking wet, looking like a drowned rat. Turns out, he’s a musician. He pulls out a guitar and starts playing. The whole café goes silent. I’m thinking, “This is gonna be good.” And it is! He’s belting out these tunes, and everyone’s clapping. I’m feeling all the feels.

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