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About Mariupol

Happy? Shit, once saw a dude propose there—da, for real! Drunk off ass, kneels in glitter, girl laughs, “Live forever with me?” Straight outta movie, but dumber. Laughed my ass off—cold, calculated, sure, but that was gold. Surprised me too—some brothels got rules, no kissin’, like it’s sacred or somethin’. Weird, right?

Town overview

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I head over to the bakery, and it’s on Vulytsia Kostiantynivska. The smell of fresh bread hits me like a brick wall. I’m starving! But I gotta focus. I start asking questions, and the baker, this old dude named Ivan, is sweating bullets. He’s like, “It was the oven! The oven!” I’m thinking, “Dude, you sure it wasn’t your cooking?”