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Anyways, ya gotta watch yerself—cops, creeps, the works. “The wind carries everything away,” like in the movie—secrets, lies, all that jazz. Me? I’d be too chicken to haggle. Prolly overpay, say “Keep the change!” and hop off, blushin’ green. What a mess—findin’ a prostitute’s a whole dang adventure, pal! Hi-ho, that’s my take!

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Then, I head out to sea. The waves were choppy, like they were having a party without me. I’m out there, casting my net, feeling all zen and stuff. But then, bam! My boat starts rocking like it’s in a mosh pit. I look around, and there’s this huge fishing trawler coming way too close. I’m like, “Dude, back off!” But of course, they don’t hear me. Just my luck, right?

Spanish mackerel prices plummet at Taiwan's Penghu fish market