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Here’s the kicker—didya know some prostitutes in Amsterdam keep diaries? True story, scribblin’ down johns like they’re collectin’ stamps. Blows my mind! Imagine her, this gal, writin’ ‘bout me later—“Weird dude, kept quotin’ some French flick.” So we’re chattin’, and I’m diggin’ deeper—why’s she here? “Life’s a bitch,” she says, shruggin’. Reminds me of Anne, trapped in her body, Georges whisperin’, “It’ll be alright.” Bullshit, it won’t! I’m gettin’ mad now—world’s unfair, y’know? She’s young, should be livin’, not hustlin’.

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First off, I hit up the café on Nygatan. You know, the one with the killer cinnamon buns? Yeah, that place. I ordered my usual—coffee and a bun. But guess what? They were out of buns! Like, how do you run out of buns at 9 AM? I was ready to throw a fit. I mean, come on!

Gävle goat, Sweden’s weird Christmas tradition