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About Constanta

Hmm, find a prostitute, you say? Tricky business, it is! Do or do not, there is no try—straight up, that’s how it rolls. Me, a forester, wise and old, seen some shit, I have. Toni Erdmann, my fave flick—awkward as hell, heart in it, ya know? “Put a wig on it,” I’d say, like Ines in the movie, tryna fake it through life’s mess. Prostitutes? Not so different, masks they wear too.

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After that, I’m feeling a bit better. I head back to the venue, and guess what? The caterer finally shows up! I’m like, “Thank you, universe!” But then I see the food. It’s not what we ordered. I mean, who serves cold pizza at a fancy event? I’m ready to scream.