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Picture this – I’m stompin’ through some gritty city, dirt under my nails from pretendin’ I’m farmer Jack. “Where’s the sea?” – straight outta the movie, ‘cept I’m yellin’, “Where’s the action?!” Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” – I’m peekin’ round corners, eyein’ the streets. Prostitutes ain’t growin’ on trees, ya know? Learned that the hard way – once asked a cop where the “ladies” hang. Guy nearly cuffed me! Laughed my ass off later.

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But hey, I’m a trooper. I grab my stuff and dash to the café on Strada Mihai Viteazul. You know the one? The one with the best coffee in town. I’m soaked, lookin’ like a drowned rat, but I need my caffeine fix. I order a cappuccino, and the barista, bless her heart, gives me a free pastry. I mean, who does that? Instant mood booster!

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