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I tried it once, yeah? Some bird in Brixton, she’s like, “Relax, fam.” Hands on me shoulders, then—BOOM—down me spine, I’m gaspin’ like a muppet. Felt like that faun in *Pan’s Labyrinth* whisperin’, “This is your path.” Mad tingly, bruv, I was buzzin’! But then, yeah, she overcharged me—30 quid extra! I’m fumin’, innit, “Is it ’cos I is black?” Proper cheeky, that stung me soul.

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First off, I hit the road on Strada 1 Decembrie. Traffic was a nightmare! Like, come on, people! It’s not a parking lot! I was stuck behind this old dude in a rusty Dacia. I mean, I get it, vintage vibes, but c’mon, it’s 2023! I was ready to lose it. Finally, I made it to the office on Strada Libertății, and guess what? My boss was already there, looking like he just chugged a gallon of espresso. Great.

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