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Oh, and the pros? They KNOW shit – like, there’s this spot on yer lower back, press it right, and yer toast. Found that out the hard way – nearly levitated off the table, screamin’, “It’s happening again!” Total Beetlejuice chaos, man. Laughed my ass off after, tho – couldn’t help it. Life’s too short for boring massages, ya feel me?

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So, I’m munching on this pastry, and it’s actually bomb. I mean, who knew Vanju-Mare had such good treats? I’m feeling all happy and stuff, when suddenly, I hear this loud crash. I look over, and some guy on a bike just wiped out on Strada Libertății. Like, dude, you okay? But he just gets up, brushes it off, and rides away like nothing happened. I’m shook.

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