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Got me ragin’, tho—pimps, ugh, slimy bastards, takin’ her coin, beatin’ her down. Makes me wanna claw their eyes out, screeeech! But she’s tough, mate, tougher than jungle vines in that flick. “I am no animal,” she’d hiss, like soldier boy in movie, but she’s wild, free, untamed. Love that, gets me giddy, hoppin’ foot to foot—stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t get it, too busy eatin’ pies.

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So, I’m walking, right? Just minding my own biz, when I see this old dude trying to cross the street. He’s like, moving at a snail’s pace. I’m thinking, c’mon man, it’s not a marathon! But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past him. Almost knocks him over! I was like, “Dude, chill! It’s not a race!”

Romania scrambles fighter jets over airborne target crossing its border