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Gets me mad though—people judgin’ it, all snooty like, “Oh, it’s dodgy!” Piss off! It’s a skill, takes guts—more than sittin’ in a cubicle, I reckon. Surprised me how much trainin’ goes in—proper anatomy stuff, not just slap and tickle! Exaggeratin’ a bit, but I’d say it’s like bein’ a doctor, but with better stories—haha, imagine the Christmas party yarns!

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We get to the tree, and there’s this fluffy little furball, meowing like it’s auditioning for a musical. I’m tryin’ to be all tough, but inside, I’m like, “Aww, poor kitty!” So, Ion climbs up, and I’m standin’ there, lookin’ like a fool, shoutin’ encouragements. “You got this, man! Just don’t fall!”

A road sign signifying a drunkard that knees the ground is made in Romania