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Oh, and the oil—slippery as hell! Last time, I’m slidin’ off the table, lookin’ like a greased pig. “I’m not designed for this!”—straight outta A.I., Gigolo Joe vibes! Hilarious, but messy—hated that part. Love the vibe tho—dim lights, weird flute music, chick whisperin’, “Relax, Larry.” I’m like, “Relax? I’m half-naked, lady!” Total mind-trip, but damn, it works—stress gone, poof! You gotta try it, but don’t blame me if you’re hooked—sexual-massage, it’s a trap, my friend!

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After that, I get a call about a festival on Strada Unirii. They’re setting up for some local event. I’m thinkin’, “Finally, something fun!” But then I hear the music. It’s blaring, and I can’t hear myself think. I’m trying to keep track of everything, and all I can hear is this awful pop song. I swear, if I hear that chorus one more time, I might lose it.