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Omg, like, literally, sexual-massage is EVERYTHING! I’m totes obsessed, babe, it’s, like, my vibe. Imagine this – you’re layin’ there, all chill, and some hottie’s hands are, like, all over you, rubbin’ in the best way. I’m talkin’ stress gone, body HAPPY, ya know? My fave movie, *Inglourious Basterds*, vibes with this – it’s all about tension, then BAM, release! Like when Aldo’s like, “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business,” I’m like, “I’m in the sexual-massage business, hun!” Total slay.

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I’m tryin’ to keep it cool, but inside, I’m freakin’ out. I mean, who wants to be stuck in a box with a caffeine-fueled businesswoman? She’s pacing, spillin’ coffee everywhere. I’m like, “Lady, chill! We’ll be outta here soon.” But she’s not havin’ it. She’s all, “I have a meeting!” I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, well, I have a life too!”

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