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Favorite part? When they hit that spot—ya know, *that* spot—feels like the universe explodes, motherfucker! Like in *Turin Horse*, “Everything’s in ruins,” but good ruins, ya dig? I’m yellin’ in my head, “Fuck yeah, untie them knots!” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but shit, it’s my story! Downside? Costs a grip—50 bucks for 30 minutes? Robbery! Still, worth it, motherfucker.

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First off, I hit up Strada Principală for breakfast. Grabbed a coffee at that little joint, Café Barbuletu. Best coffee in town, no joke. But the barista? Ugh, she was in a mood. Like, chill, lady! I just want my caffeine fix. She spilled half my drink, and I’m like, “Really? Is this a coffee shop or a splash zone?”