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About Myself
Good to see you, I am Lydia, by the way? I am domiciled in Almancil, and I give thought to Find A Prostitute every day. You make my heart race, i take pleasure in Erotic massage and Titjob? New cultures and ideas excite my soul..
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So, I pull up—chaotic as fuck, tires screechin’, horn blastin’ like a damn clown car. She’s all, “You got cash, fam?” and I’m like, “Girl, I got SKILLS—teach ya to parallel park!” She laughs, like, “Bruh, I ain’t tryna park nothin’!” I’m dyin’, ‘cause—real talk—prostitutes don’t give a FUCK ‘bout drivin’ lessons, but I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see the absurdity! She’s out here hustlin’, and I’m tryna make it a driver’s ed skit!
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First stop, I hit up the local game shop. It’s on Avenida 25 de Abril. I’m hyped to check out the new releases. But guess what? They’re sold out! Like, seriously? Who buys all the games? I’m fuming. I mean, c’mon, it’s Almancil, not a gaming capital!
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